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Can you masturbate with other people?

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This lesson supports curriculum codes:

  • ABLEWA Stage D (VCHPEP048)
  • Year 10 (ACPPS092; ACPPS093)


This lesson aims to develop awareness of consensual shared sexual behaviours. Different jurisdictions may have different legal ages of consent for sexual activity.

Foundation Knowledge for this lesson includes understanding of what it means to be alone or not alone and to differentiate between public and private places and behaviours.

Generalisation ideas:

  • Relationship development:  discuss intimate relationship development and use this as an example of a shared sexual activity that may help build intimacy but isn’t penetrative sex.
  • Reinforce sexuality rights and the law in your jurisdiction.
  • Consequences:  what if you masturbate with someone without their consent?  how might it feel to engage in sexy behaviour with someone else? what might happen if you do?
  • Flipside:  what if the person is under 16 years of age (or legal age in your jurisdiction)?  what if someone you don’t know invites you to touch them in a sexy way?
  • Rules of Sexy Touch
  • Wording:  Bring awareness to different terms that relate to this behaviour to ensure students know what they are consenting to e.g. sexy touch, foreplay, wanking together, hand job, fingering, mutual masturbation, etc.
  • Social stories:  consider how they might go about finding out if their partner consents to the activity; what to do if consent is withdrawn during sexy touch; consequences of not following the law; how this behaviour might change a relationship for the better or worse; the role of communication in negotiating sexual play.
  • Protective Education:  Who will you talk to if you feel unsafe?  Who will you tell if someone does something to you without your consent?

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